The Gnome Sez: It’s Canada day, being Canadian I am off drinking beer and saying “eh” as much as possible. So, I’ll let Jeff tackle today’s post. Also, math is hard so try to follow Jeff’s logic on this one.
Being a teacher, I tend to get hounded by students who want me to donate money to whatever particular causes they’re supporting at the moment. This, quite naturally, gets old before too long, but I do try to help them out for two reasons: first, they’re often trying to collect money for what amounts to a worthy cause – cancer research, animal shelters, all that good stuff. Second, because I understand what it’s like to ask someone to pay for a fundraiser item that isn’t nearly worth what you’re charging – I spent six years selling hoagies (or heroes, or subs, depending on your geography) around my neighborhood just so I could go with the band to Toronto (Gnome geography note: That’s in Canada!). We’re not talking deluxe subs, either – these were garden-variety salami, bologna, American cheese, lettuce, tomato affairs on a six-inch bun.
All of this adds up to me giving a few dollars to students every semester, and honestly, I’m okay with it. Mostly. Unless I’m completely getting bent over a barrel, as was the case a few months ago when a student asked if I’d buy a coupon to a restaurant to support her sorority.
I will try to focus this conversation on food (as the blog rules demand), but I need to at least touch on the fact that I’ve never understood the concept of Greek life. Are 18-22 year olds really so desperate for inclusion that they have to create groups with no purpose other than existing? I’ve heard the fraternity and sorority students give their recruitment speeches a number of times, and I just don’t GET it. They always talk about how being a part of Greek life establishes leadership skills, which will look good on a resume. Is there anyone over 30 in a position to hire someone who says “Woah! You were in a fraternity? That’s just the type of person we’ve been looking for! Welcome aboard, but first we have to paddle you in a homoerotic ceremony that is set up to degrade you in front of drunken strangers!” Bizarre.
Anyway, the coupon in question was for a particular cause the sorority was supporting at the time, so I ponied up five bucks, put the coupon in my pocket and didn’t think anything more of it…until I got to my office and actually looked at the damn thing. As you can see in the (unfortunately blurry) picture I took before tossing the coupon in the trash, the neon pink slip granted me the privilege of getting 20% off an order of food, provided I ate at the restaurant in question on one day only after 1:00 in the afternoon.
Let’s do the math, here. Since I paid $5.00 for the coupon, my order total would have to be $25.00 for it to pay for itself. If I spent $30.00, the coupon would save me ONE WHOLE DOLLAR off my order, once you took the coupon’s cost into consideration.
Now, you might be saying to yourself, “Jeff, perhaps this is an upscale restaurant we’re talking about here, where the menu prices would be much higher than your standard Wendy’s combo meal.” Well, random voice, that’s a good point – and with a name like “Top Ten”, I can just picture the glitz and glamour. But wait! Top Ten is actually a place where, as listed on the coupon, they sell hamburgers and chicken wings, hardly the fare that fetches big bucks. The wings I usually see advertised are more of the “x number for a dollar!” variety, anyway, and that’s certainly the case in this college town. And before anyone thinks otherwise, this 20% excludes any alcoholic beverages as well, so you couldn’t make up the difference with a couple of overpriced girl drinks.
My point is that there’s such a thing as perceived value. There have been studies done which show that people are more willing to help someone out for free than they are for, say, 50 cents an hour. It’s because people have a hard time not seeing the number and saying “that’s how much they value my help?”, as opposed to working for free and thinking “I’m doing a favor for this person, which is the nice thing to do and/or I can hold this over his or her head the next time I need something done”. As such, this is the worst coupon ever, and I think I’d purposely avoid the Top Ten restaurant if I ever had the opportunity to go there. I’d rather have just given the girl in my class five bucks – at least then I could just have gone on with my life instead of spending time wringing my hands over just how useless this fundraiser was to me.
